The Rebecca Project

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Adapting to Life as an Expat

Published by Rebecca Raspberry // The Rebecca Project

When an expat friend recently remained stubborn on a point I saw as dead-set ridiculous and at odds with the reality of life and business in the US, I had to throw up my hands.

‘Haven’t you learned this by now?!?!’ screamed my inner monologue.

But maybe he hadn’t.

People are not the same, our experiences are not the same. The lessons I’ve learned living overseas and in trying to adapt to new surroundings are not going to be exactly the same as next expat. We all find some things easier to cope with than others, and we encounter different things at different times. And we all get stuck on some of the most insignificant things! It was unfair of me to expect he’d already experienced this and thus expect the same of him as I did of myself.

This conversation inspired a piece published at Ustralian (the hub for all things Aussie in the United States) about adjusting to life as an expat. It’s about embracing the change, about consciously opening yourself up to the new experiences, even when your first instinct is to close up like a clam.

Adjusting takes longer than you think.

To borrow a term from Rachel Hunter: It doesn’t happen overnight, but it does happen.

For those who aren’t living the expat life, the closest thing I’ve found to explaining some of the oddities is by watching House Hunters International. People moving overseas check out three apartments/houses for rent or sale in their new town, and choose one of them. You see these people fixate on some of the smallest things — like one bloke who couldn’t handle showing over the toilet in a miniature bathroom in Hong Kong, or the American housewife who couldn’t handle the fact Norwegian kitchens didn’t come with in-sink garbage disposal. If you find this show a little exasperating, then you’ve got the idea of what life is like as an expat: a little trying at times, but ultimately a different (and rewarding) experience.

Check out Ustralian on the web or on Twitter.

Living it up in the Lake Conjola Sunshine

Published by Rebecca Raspberry // The Rebecca Project

Welcome to Lake Conjola, where the lake meets the ocean.

Three hours south of Sydney is a little slice of heaven called Lake Conjola. Small communities dot the lake, some with names that evoke the holiday spirit, like Manyana and Fisherman’s Paradise.

Wishing You a Safe and Happy New Year!

Published by Rebecca Raspberry // The Rebecca Project

Wherever you are in the world, I’m wishing you a safe and happy 2013.

Happy New Year! The scene earlier tonight, along the Moat toward the Thapae Gate in Chiang Mai.

Wats, wats and more wats

Published by Rebecca Raspberry // The Rebecca Project

Wat Chiang Mun.

In Thailand, if you only have one thing on your To Do List, chances are it’ll take you a week to get around to it. The one thing on my list was to go adventuring and check out some of the temples around my guesthouse. And yesterday, I finally managed to accomplish that.

I haven’t sought out the beauty in Chiang Mai and I haven’t documented it. Wandering, looking, snapping: that’s my preferred means of distilling the essence of a city. I use my camera to capture the parts that contribute to the whole picture. But I had not even bothered to charge the battery for my digital SLR since I’d left Sydney. That’s so unlike me.

Buddha standing tall.

Dogs are as ubiquitous as wats here.

Chiang Mai is famous for being a city of temples, known locally as Wats. There are over 300 of them in the city, and as we discovered on our way to the driving range yesterday, there are wats opposite wats, beside wats. I have been in Chiang Mai for about three weeks, and today was the first time I’d stepped foot inside a wat.

For a brief moment, I flirted with the idea of spending my days visiting every single wat in Chiang Mai. It’d make for an interesting experience, but Wat Fatigue set in quickly after my half-dozen. Much like my experience with cathedrals in Europe, they all start to look the same after a while.

No post is overlooked. Everything is decorated.

An offering to Buddha.

Dragons abound.

The chedi at Wat Chiang Mun.

Miniature buddha with an elephant army.

Chores and tourists.

I waited until the golden hour to go adventuring – just me and my camera – and my favourite time of day didn’t disappoint. The whitewashed walls of the wats are shaded enough to cover any signs of fatigue, the mirror mosaics that adorn the pagodas shimmer in the setting sun, the gold-leafed chedis seem lit from the love, compassion and knowledge within. Some of the junior monks were out sweeping up the leaves around the compounds, dressed in their ceremonial saffron-coloured robes. Dogs lazed about on the grass, the paths and on the cool, tiled stairs. Even they seemed to be at peace.

I’m enamoured with the quiet beauty of wats. There’s something calming about being inside these places, and as ye of little faith, I find that very, very interesting.

Wat Baan Ping.

I love the decorative elements on these temples.

More decorative dragons.

On the temple trail.

The stunning amount of details on a simple window shutter.

Buddha gets around.

Merry Christmas!

Published by Rebecca Raspberry // The Rebecca Project

Here’s a little song the American wrote to celebrate the silly season. But beware: it’s catchy!

So, it’s Christmas Day here in Chiang Mai and it was a pretty low-key day. I wasn’t able to fall asleep until the sun rose. By the time I awoke, the UN Bakery was fresh out of baguettes and French loaves, but was bursting at the seams with mince pies. I returned with the last four bread rolls and chocolate croissants to enjoy with our powdered coffee for the celebratory breakfast at 2pm. We’ve been getting up in the PM since we arrived here, and have (so far) been unable to readjust our schedule.

As we had brekkie, I skyped with my family who were winding down after a busy day with the relatives in Sydney. It’s days such as these that I am lucky to be living in an age where we can connect instantly, visually, with those we love. Just seeing my family, sitting around the dining table, and chewing the fat about the day and plans for the holidays was so wonderful. I miss them enormously, and I am really starting to rethink this whole travelling for Christmas thing we’ve opted for… I’m really looking forward to chatting with the North American contingent in an hour or so.

This evening, we took a stroll around Chiang Mai. On the way past Thapae Gate, we stopped to have a peek at the markets and food stalls and concerts celebrating the New Year. A young girl was performing traditional a Thai dance in an elaborate costume. The Thai Post Office had a stall and was selling postcards: a perfect opportunity for me to get all those postcards I have already written, mailed. We wandered around for a little, then continued on past the nightclubs and their ‘friendly ladies’, to the Night Markets.

As per tradition (one that started when we were in Germany last year when everything else was closed), we had Christmas Dinner at Pizza Hut. So American, right? And now, I can hardly move. All of that doughy goodness! It was a welcome change from the vege fried rice /pad thai combo we have each night.

And I hope you had a great Christmas, or are in the process of having a good one.

Can You Ever Just Be Whelmed?

Published by Rebecca Raspberry // The Rebecca Project

“I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?”

“I think you can in Europe.” *.

Ah, I am overwhelmed. For a multitude of reasons. Trying to settle in to life here in Chiang Mai. Trying to adjust to life without work, to not be needed. Trying to get kick started with an online course I am taking. Trying to write the best posts ever and never being happy with the finished product. Trying to read, read, read so that I absorb all of the books I set out to read whilst on this finite sabbatical from work. Trying to float ideas I have for a new business. Trying to follow-up with all the people I am scheduled to connect with or have been lax in connecting with, and feeling guilty about it. Trying to sit down for more time to crank out the next great Australian/American novel. Trying to get to yoga class, and not ever making it there. I’m trying to do it all, 110%, but feel like I’m not doing enough nor getting anywhere. And that I ought to be doing more.

If you were to see me right now, I’d closely resemble a pretzel. But with cheese. And polka dot PJs.

This is pretty much what I look like right now.

[Source]

Are you feeling overwhelmed, too?

It’s time to cut myself some slack. I need to take a breath and be more mindful of quieting the unhelpful, negative self-talk.

So in light of feeling off-balance, I wish to speak positively and share the love. Here’s three people whose words I have dug this week. It’s not rocket science, but sometimes turning the focus elsewhere and appreciating the contributions of others is a much better use of my time than navel-gazing.

No. 1: Alex Franzen

Alex Franzen has kick-arse advice, and is just one of those people who seems really authentic. The type of person I’d say g’day to if I ran into her in the supermarket. But I doubt that would actually happen, unless I found myself in Minnesota.

A goal of mine for 2013 is to attend one of her writing workshops or schedule a one-on-one session with her. Plus, I love just staring at her website. We’re totally on the same level, design wise.

One of my favourite posts is this one. You can also follow her on Twitter: @Alex_Franzen.

No.2: Liv Hambrett

I met the (usually) German-based Liv Hambrett recently when I was passing through Sydney, and the woman is slaying dragons left, right and centre! She recently relaunched her all-in-one blog and portfolio at LivHambrett.com, and is currently living it up on a cultural exploration of all things Australia with the Significant German. With plenty of wine and cheese.

Today, she had one of her articles named by The Daily Life as one of the best in 2012. In this list, she stands beside other amazing writers such as Clementine Ford, Julia Baird and Clem Bastow. Take note, everyone. This woman is going places!

Follow her on Twitter: @LivWrites.

No. 3: Amber Gregory

Amber Gregory is one half of Amber And Scott. I stumbled upon her blog via a Radvent post she recently published, and I really enjoyed poking around her site, and reading about her life. They have just recently lost one of their beautiful cats, Jeffy, and reading how much-loved he was and how he was such a big part of their life was beautiful. That’s one of the reasons I love blogging: I love finding people who share my interests and outlook on life. I love hearing their stories and empathising, relating to them. We’re all in this together.

Follow her on Twitter: @Cardassianv0le.

*A sneaky quote from one of the greatest teen movies of all time, 1999’s ‘Ten Things I Hate About You’.